Olympic cheating has included poison, car rides, and now, apparently, inflated penises

Perhaps you saw the story about the ski jumpers who were said to be cheating by injecting a foreign substance into their, how to say this delicately, packages.

Or, as one U.K. headline bluntly put it, “Why Olympians are injecting acid into their PENIS to gain a competitive advantage”.

To be clear, the headline really did render that one word in all-caps.

As is often the case with the modern viral story, the most sensational bits are rather thinly reported. The German publication that broke the allegations cited background chatter that certain jumpers had used substances such as hyaluronic acid to “temporarily enlarge” the crotch area during preseason testing, when all athletes have precise body measurements taken. An artificially enlarged crotch, so to speak, would then allow the jumper to wear a suit — which is supposed to be skintight — with a little extra fabric in the nether regions, which would provide extra lift while soaring through the air.